


Ivan just wanted to have dinner

by manateehugger



Category: Vorkosigan Saga - Lois McMaster Bujold
Genre: AU, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-02
Updated: 2015-08-18
Packaged: 2018-01-10 21:43:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 18,057
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1164874
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/manateehugger/pseuds/manateehugger
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ivan finds out he has an illegitimate child. Canon until after A Civil Campaign where it starts to diverge.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Ivan entered his building at the end of the work day. He was exhausted though it was only mid-week and they weren’t even worried about war down at HQ so he’d been getting off at his normal hours. Ivan wondered when he’d gotten so old that going out on the town after work no longer appealed to him. Now he just wanted to make some dinner and catch up on his holovid shows. Despite his fatigue Ivan considered that the month had been smooth and lacking in incidents. At least Miles the maniacal hadn’t been around to drag him into anything that would get him blown up recently. Really it was a new record. Of course that might be chalked up to the little git being on his honeymoon tormenting poor Ekaterin. Well, considering that she had proposed to Miles, at least she had volunteered for the job. Usually Ivan was just forcibly drafted. 

“Mail for you sir,” the concierge stated with a smile.

He handed Ivan some discs as Ivan strolled through the lobby to the lift. Ivan accepted them and headed up in the lift. As he rode upwards he browsed through the various discs. A heavy-ish package from RenMa caught his attention. He had no idea what it was about and the writing on the package except for his address was in traditional characters not the Cyrillic or even Roman alphabet. Well, if it had gotten past security so it must be safe he decided. Ivan also seriously considered that maybe he should just order in tonight and save on both prep time and cleaning up. Plus there was that little Greekie place that had just opened up and was offering specials for this week only.

Ivan opened his door and wandered into the kitchen to find the flimsy for the greekie place then considered what to order. After figuring that out and ordering take-out he wandered back to his mail and opened the package to find a hand written letter, two discs enclosed and most bizarrely some tubes, one seeming to contain human hair. He frowned and popped one disc in to play on the commconsole. It was just a series of images of a serious looking boy in a cadet uniform. Not a Barrayaran cadet uniform so not some distant cousin Ivan decided. The kid looked to be in his early teens. Ivan considered this, black hair and oriental features but light skinned. 

Ivan wondered if this was from that “Feed the Orphans” foundation he’d been donating towards. He had started sending the organization money because one of the other officers had harangued the entire office into funding a school on Tau Verde. Which, to be fair had only meant that everyone had to contribute twenty marks. But that twenty marks had opened a gate to more requests for donations from other organizations. Ivan had decided to start regularly donating to some of them since he had a weakness for sad children and kittens… and damsels in distress… and family… and really Miles talked him into a lot of things that Ivan in his good sense should have avoided. So he was kind of a push over.

But, but, he just wanted to help and it made him feel good and it didn’t cost much and it was a great thing to bring up in conversation with women who loved that sort of thing. Plus he’d gotten this really cute drawing from the little Kshytrian girl he was sponsoring a month or so ago, though he didn’t know where it had gone. What was her name? He wrinkled his brow, then wondered suddenly in horror if something had happened to the kid and the organization was assigning him a replacement.

He popped out the first disc and inserted the second one hoping for an explanation. Bad things shouldn’t happen to kids, Ivan decided firmly hoping the little Khsytrian was alright.

An Asian man in dress greens darker than Ivan’s came on.

“Captain Ivan Vorpatril,” the man began, butchering Ivan’s last name in the process. This was a common enough problem with off-worlders though Ivan didn’t know why. At least his name had sensible vowels unlike some people, like Vorcrsnosjia.

“I am Major TieXue Cheng of the People’s Glorious Military on RenMa. About fifteen years back you,” the man on the vid inhaled sharply, seeming to be filled with pain at the following words, “were introduced to my younger sister MeiLi who bore your child, MingXia. I have enclosed both hair and DNA samples should you be doubtful of my claims and wish to confirm with your own people. Vidpix of what he looks like are enclosed. I would like you to meet him sooner rather than later as he is - as I think you could talk some sense into him. My address and family insignia are enclosed. Please show the RenMa embassy on your planet this insignia to obtain quick entry visas. I would also request a confirmation of you coming that I might properly prepare. I will assume that if you do not respond that you have no interest in the child and I will trouble you no further. Good day.”

The vid ended with a picture of the man’s address and what must be the family seal he was talking about. Ivan stared at the vid for several long minutes before rousing himself to his feet. He wasn’t hungry anymore.


	2. Chapter 2

There were plenty of Ivan Vorpatrils in the Barrayaran Imperium, Ivan rationalized. Maybe this boy wasn’t his kid. Maybe he belonged to some other Ivan Vorpatril and this Major TieXue guy had just put down the first address he had found for an Ivan Vorpatril… yeah.

This didn’t stop Ivan from racing off to ImpMil with the samples he’d been sent. His GPS predicted it would be a half hour commute from his apartment to the hospital. He took that as a challenge and made it in ten. He told himself that it wasn’t because he was nervous, he was just doing his usual cool, casual thing, nothing abnormal at all. No sir.

Ivan entered the hospital and realized he had no idea where to go or who to talk to about his problem. He settled on sheepishly asking the information desk for advice first. The sergeant at the desk, a man with dark circles under his eyes and a bald patch just starting to become noticeable on his head was incredibly sympathetic to Ivan’s plight and gave him directions to “Family Planning” then launched into a woeful diatribe of his own family problems.

“I tell ya, you think at twenty you’ve got it all figured out. Then some girl tells you she’s pregnant with your child. So now you have to marry her and put up with her mother. Both of them make you crazy but there’s so much pressure to stay together because, well, she’s pregnant with your child and it’s the Vor thing to do. Then you end up with three more kids and no sleep and don’t even ask me where the money goes! Why do they need high end baby diapers anyway? They’re just going to get thrown out when the kid craps in them! Everything just dies when you have kids. It’s probably the lack of sleep and the constant stress of preventing them from killing each other and themselves. I haven’t gotten laid in months and the worst part is I couldn’t care less because my libido is practically gone. Initially you keep telling yourself it’s worth it. At least you’ll have some strong boys to carry on the family name. But the first one got on the rhythmic gymnastics team and the second one can’t walk and chew gum! And everyone keeps telling me I’m too hard on the boys! I just wanted a kid I could play catch with, maybe teach him how to hunt and shave but nooo nothing in my life goes right, ever.”

“Er, yeah,” Ivan agreed uncomfortably, “thanks.”

“Your best bet is to just pay court ordered child payments and stay the hell away from the banshees, nothing good comes from marrying the gal you knocked up,” the sergeant called after him.

Ivan headed up to the fifth floor and a small room off to the side labeled “Family Planning”. He explained his plight to the receptionist, a young woman who promptly stopped flirting with him after he mentioned the paternity test. Then he was instructed to take a seat, fill out some forms and wait to be called into the back so a doctor could see him. So Ivan did as he was told, he filled out some forms and waited a while. His time was spent watching the other couples around him looking pleased or as miserable as he felt. 

The doctor, a major in his mid-fifties with graying hair around the temples and a stern look invited Ivan into a room in the back where Ivan explained the situation.

“I think it’s entirely possible that these samples were meant for someone else. I’ve never even been to RenMa! But… but to be on the safe side could you test me, and then maybe pass the genetic test on to any other Ivan Vorpatrils if it turns out that I’m not the da,” Ivan asked.

The doctor, whose name tag said Leibowitz looked Ivan over and shook his head but offered no explanation. He professionally drew blood and collected a hair sample.

“Please return in half an hour for your results,” Dr Leibowitz stated.

Ivan slid out of the chair and sat in the waiting room.

Time passed slowly out in the waiting room and Ivan chose spend it watching a cooking show on how to make the best lemon soufflé. He couldn’t understand why he would spend all that time zesting lemons when he was sure he could order a tastier one from someone else and then not have to worry about making it at all. Considerations for the best ingredients for the soufflé were interrupted by Ivan’s other pastime, drinking copious amounts of water from the water cooler and subsequently needing to use the lav. He thought he could use a drink but the hospital didn’t serve alcohol. Ivan thought that was very rude, people were already in here suffering, there was no need to add to that by taking away their wine too. Ivan drank more water and visited the lav more times in a half hour than any normal person should.

“Captain Vorpatril, your results,” Leibowitz called upon Ivan’s return from his fifth trip to the bathroom. 

Ivan took the flimsies from the man and looked them over, “I- what does this even mean?”

“You are indeed the father,” Leibowitz explained.

“But- I – how?”

“Are you asking me how people get pregnant and have children, young man,” Leibowitz demanded.

Ivan just flipped helplessly through the pages and looked up at the doctor.

The doctor sighed, “is there someone you would like to call, perhaps have them come pick you up? You do seem to be in a state of shock.”

Ivan shook his head turned and stumbled out.

The sergeant at the information desk was still on duty. He winced upon seeing Ivan’s face, “you poor bastard, some witch got you? Remember what I said! Just pay child support!”

Ivan was already heading out the door with his head down and tried to ignore the other man. He wondered if fleeing the planet was an option at this point. He could run away to… well he didn’t know right now, he couldn’t think straight. But then, the Major in the vid had said that all Ivan had to do was just ignore the message and things could go back to normal. Ivan leaned against his car and thought about this. It wasn’t like Ivan had to go see the boy and no one in Ivan’s family or on Barrayar would know if he chose not to. 

He had been the only one to see the vids and the hospital wasn’t allowed to hand his information out to just anybody. 

Ivan breathed in and out while considering how easy it would be to just ignore this situation. The fact that it would just go away on its own was a very tempting thought to him.  
Then he made the mistake of thinking about his own father. Padma Vorpatril had never gotten a chance to know his son and Ivan had never had the chance to have a father figure growing up. He knew from personal experience that this was rough on a kid. He also knew from the vidpix that the little guy didn’t look happy and that made Ivan unhappy. So Ivan took a deep breath and resolved that he would have to go to RenMa to at least see the boy and figure out what he could do for him. He was the boy’s da after all, that was his job.


	3. Chapter 3

Ivan’s new found fortitude quickly faltered at the thought of explaining things to his boss… and his mother… and Gregor. Ivan then briefly considered faking his own death. He gave up when he decided that it would be a lot of effort and he didn’t have the flair and imagination for it the way Miles did. He’d probably get found out while trying to sneak onto an outgoing jumpship. Then he’d get dragged back to the planet and then he’d have to explain everything to his relatives anyway. No, better just do it now and get it over with Ivan decided. 

Ivan then briefly considered getting a stiff drink before going to see his mother. This was a tempting idea. Until he pictured himself totally sloshed and trying to explain a delicate situation to his irate mother. Nope, not a good plan Ivan thought. Ivan decided he’d need to keep all of his wits about him for that interview. Maybe then he’d reward himself with a glass of scotch, or a bottle depending on how things went.

Ivan arrived at his mother’s apartment anxious and uncertain about what to say. He had thought for sure he’d come up with something intelligent to say in the car. He sighed, telling himself he was relieved when one of the maids let him up into the apartment and informed him that both Lady Alys and Simon were still out for the day. She was kind enough to offer him a drink which he accepted while deciding that it might help his creative thinking process. It did not. When Lady Alys and Simon walked in the door together he still had no idea how to tactfully bring up the fact that he had just found out about his illegitimate child.

“Ivan,” Lady Alys noted with surprise and a hint of worry, “may I ask what this unexpected visit is about? Usually I have to chase you down to get you to come visit me.”

“Er, yes well I would like to talk to you alone for a minute if possible. It’s about family business,” Ivan began.

Simon showed no emotion at the comment but Lady Alys took offense, “Ivan, that is incredibly rude of you. Simon is just as much a part of this house as you or I.”

“Alys, truly if the boy has some romantic entanglement to discuss with you I hardly mind stepping out,” Simon noted looking both pleased and embarrassed at her outburst.

“Absolutely not. Ivan, whatever you can say that is family business can be said in front of both of us,” Lady Alys declared sturdily.

Ivan decided he probably shouldn’t have caught her right after one of her luncheon days with the Betan diplomats. She was usually especially twitchy after those. Damn Betans…  
He considered the most eloquent way to phrase the information, “remember how you’re always complaining about not being a grandmother?”

Upon seeing Lady Alys expression Ivan decided that this was not the best way to phrase the information.

“Well who is the mother? I do hope you were being careful with Lady Felicia Vorvayne considering that she is still married… it wasn’t her was it?”

“It might be a good idea to increase your current guard. Her husband is an exceptional shot. Good officer too,” Simon automatically strategized while shaking his head in exasperation.

“Erm, no actually the mother isn’t Barrayaran… or on planet. They’re on RenMa or at least the boy is,” Ivan explained. 

Simon and Lady Alys stared at him with a mixture of disbelief and, and Ivan didn’t even know at this point. Outrage? Confusion? Gastric distress? He was having gastric distress now considering that he hadn’t eaten anything and the guy who was supposed to bring his take-out. That fellow had likely come and gone with his food after realizing Ivan wasn’t home. Ivan decided that he really shouldn’t have been drinking on an empty stomach.

“Well when were you on RenMa,” Lady Alys asked glancing between him and Simon.

Ivan shook his head, “I wasn’t ever I swear! I would have remembered! I don’t know where I met this girl, woman and no one ever mentioned the kid to me!”

“Ever mentioned? You mean this isn’t a new development? Well how old is the child,” Lady Alys demanded.

“Erm, about fourteen,” Ivan said.

“Fourteen years plus nine months,” Simon muttered glancing at Lady Alys.

“Ivan, my dear and only child. You’re an idiot,” Lady Alys declared.

“Hey, this must have been when I was seventeen and out trying to find Miles after his insane plans blew up and they were accusing him of building an army. Does anybody remember that I had to travel halfway across the galaxy? By myself, because the military ship I was on left without me and was sabotaged?! It wasn’t my fault,” Ivan cried.

Lady Alys rubbed her forehead, “well, and why now?”

Ivan shrugged helplessly and offered them the vid discs he’s brought with him.

They played them on Lady Alys’s commconsole.

“If this is a trap, then it’s the worst one that has ever been set,” Simon noted judiciously. He was scanning through his portable comm while the vid played.

“Where is the boy’s mother in all of this,” Lady Alys asked, “surely she should be involved in informing Ivan of their son. Why hasn’t she contacted us?”

“MeiLi appears to be deceased,” Simon noted looking at information on his own commconsole, “by about four years. RenMa used to be one of the planets Beta Colony was interested in helping to develop. Beta was helping the planet rebuild major highways and buildings after an amazing earthquake years before. Along with the technical training came ideas that were dangerous to the government. There was a civil war only a few years ago where people were trying to overthrow the communist party in charge and create a democracy. The party crushed the dissenters after a two year war then put the planet on what was expected to be a permanent isolationist policy. That fell through three years later with massive famines that almost led to a second civil war. Travel there is now allowed but quite restricted,” Illyan noted reading from his own commconsole.

“Wow. That sounds awful. I should definitely go find the kid and- and I don’t know bring him back here I guess,” Ivan declared.

Lady Alys snorted, “I think it would be best if I went as well, you’re likely to offend the locals.”

“But maman, it might be dangerous,” Ivan began.

“Which one of us carried the other through enemy territory during the Pretendership,” Lady Alys asked.

“Yes maman.”

“Gregor won’t like losing his commander of the social events on such short notice,” Simon noted neutrally.

“Gregor is a big boy and I have supreme confidence that Laisa can manage for the period of time in which I expect we will be gone,” Lady Alys stated.

“Speaking of which, have you spoken to him about this? I imagine ImpSec will also want to know about any of your offspring considering you are still technically camp stool,” Illyan stated.

“Merp,” Ivan stated unintelligently.

 

They had an appointment with Gregor two days later. It was early morning and they were sitting around a dining table with cakes and teas set out. 

Gregor was rubbing his head as if it hurt, “how did this happen, Ivan?”

“Well Gregor, when a man and woman love each other very, very much,” Ivan began sarcastically.

A stern look from Gregor cut him off and Ivan just shrugged, “Come on, I was seventeen, I thought all galactics had contraceptive implants, I didn’t know and I never asked. I mean after Simon pulled up her picture I recognized her from the landing on Beta Colony. But what she was doing there I don’t know. I mean except for waiting by the shuttle port picking up strangers. I swore by her Betan drawl she was for sure from the planet! Of course later I realized it wasn’t a proper Betan drawl but… well, I mean what’s done is done.”

“Do you think she was purposely waiting for Ivan,” Gregor asked Simon.

“Doubtful, if her goal was to find her way into the vor system she likely would have informed Ivan of the child earlier. Furthermore, her family there is high ranking as well. Any sufferings of the lower class wouldn’t reach high enough to touch them. So I do not in my professional opinion that MeiLi was a young woman attempting to flee a totalitarian government. The question of motive is unclear,” Simon shook his head.

“You think the request by the maternal uncle was genuine,” Gregor asked.

“The request that Ivan go talk to the boy? I suppose, though what he expects Ivan to say and on what topic is still very unclear. I cannot imagine how he reached the rank of major without a little knowledge of how to properly brief someone for a mission,” Simon stated.

“I don’t suppose I could talk you into letting Ivan deal with this himself, could I Lady Alys,” Gregor asked her politely.

“Are you worried about that state dinner with the Cetagandans?” she waved her hands dismissively, “I am certain that you’ll be fine.”

“Any state dinner you can walk away from is a good dinner,” Simon murmured apparently thinking about all the possible assassination attempt scenarios that came with letting strangers into one’s home and personal space.

“I dunno not being able to walk straight afterwards is half the fun, it keeps you sane too,” Ivan said, thinking instead about the wine selection available at those events.

“Well, let’s see what happens,” Gregor said.


	4. Chapter 4

After three weeks of enforced family bonding they finally landed in Xin NanJing and exited the shuttle. 

Ivan had noticed a few things while they were headed down to the planet, the first being that the area around the shuttle-port was completely brown with no trees or grass in the immediate area. Secondly he noticed that he drew a lot of stares from people. They were not the appreciative looks of women either, to Ivan’s great disappointment, but people were openly gaping at him. He’d read that foreigners were very uncommon on planet after the most recent civil war. But Ivan would have thought that these people would have seen white people before the war. 

It didn’t seem so though as he, Simon, and Lady Alys were trailed by a Zhongqing family up until they met the current ambassador of Barrayar for RenMa. Lord Lev Vortrene was a blonde haired blue eyed male in his mid-forties who seemed to draw even more attention than they did. He smiled, greeted them and led them all out to his car where they could finally talk privately.

“I understand that this is not purely a pleasure visit, sirs and madam,” Lord Vortrene said with a small smile that didn’t reach his eyes.

By the twitchiness of the man Ivan was a little worried about what this fellow had been told. Well no need to panic, we’re not here to steal your job, Ivan silently promised him. Of course, maybe there was something else going through his mind. Having the former chief of ImpSec suddenly appear at the door of a Barrayaran embassy on a backwater planet was bound to raise some alarms, Ivan decided. 

“My son recently discovered that he is a father to a child on this planet. He decided to do his paternal duty and come visit the boy, with some prodding,” Lady Alys explained.

Ivan winced, he’d only needed a little prodding, and most of that had been from his own conscience. But now was not the time to get into that discussion with his mother. 

Lord Vortrene’s eyebrows went up and he took in the little group speculatively, “I see. My orders from home had merely been to assist you as I could and nothing more. I wasn’t sure if you were here to – but anyway, yes. Do you already know where the boy is or will you be requiring my assistance to find him?”

Lady Alys unfolded a flimsy and passed it over to Lord Vortrene for inspection. 

His eyes widened slightly, “The Cheng clan? I had no idea… but the lives of the higher-ups here are private. The press here has very little power to report on this sort of thing. Especially this sort of thing. But then… I do hope this child is not from the former Vice-minister Juinwu Cheng, TieXue’s wife. That man is violent and temperamental.”

“No, the boy is apparently from the union of Ivan and TieXue’s younger sister, MeiLi Cheng,” Simon clarified. He gave Ivan a look as if to say, well look what you’ve done this time, idiot boy. 

Which really wasn’t fair because this misunderstanding happened a long while ago and he was much smarter now, Ivan thought. No reason to yell at him now for it. He already felt bad enough for failing in his paternal duties up until now.

“You say TieXue’s wife is the former Vice-minister. Was she forced to resign over some scandal,” Lady Alys asked.

Clearly Ivan’s mother was already considering all possible motives for inviting Ivan down. Were MingXia’s relatives planning on using him as a method to regain some of their lost glory or prestige? Were they now a ruined family looking for a new place to live and considering Barrayar?

“No. I’m afraid she killed herself,” Lord Vortrene admitted.

A stunned silence.

“Was Mingxia very close with his aunt then,” Ivan asked. 

Maybe TieXue Cheng had thought Ivan could pull the kid out of some deep depression because he was upset over he aunt’s death. Hell, he’d done it enough with Miles a few times. Ivan was getting to be a professional at it; though he expected to feel bad about dunking an innocent boy into ice water. 

Lord Vortrene merely shrugged, “truly I had only come into contact with Vice-minister Juinwu Cheng and her husband briefly. Her husband is particularly reclusive. Again, this is for the best, since he is known to be violent with little provocation. But allow me to explain further, Vice-minister Juinwu had been battling an illness for some time. Four months ago she was relieved of her duties and sent to The People’s First Glorious Hospital. Three months ago she left the hospital after signing herself out against physician’s orders. She had her driver take her to the KiNoUmi and there she apparently hung herself.”

“The KiNoUmi, is that a place we should be familiar with,” Simon inquired.

Lord Vortrene’s eyes widened briefly before he answered the question, “my apologies, no. But it’s such a well-known place around here and I deal with so few Barrayaran tourists that – well never mind. The KiNoUmi, also known as the ‘dead sea of trees’ is a forest located some eighty or so miles from this city. It has the dubious honor of being the number one suicide spot for people on planet after it was featured in a tragic book “Star-Crossed Lovers”, which unsurprisingly features two starcrossed lovers who find they can only be together in death. The book was published some hundred years back, though the forest was known before then. During the first twenty or so years after the Firsters arrived here there were some rough winters in which there wasn’t enough food to go around. It was a problem that stemmed from failed harvests and confusion about what native plants were safe to eat. But the elderly and infirm ended up being abandoned in that forest and left to starve to death because the Firsters couldn’t feed everyone. The whole of the KiNoUmi is considered incredibly ominous. Particularly since animals refuse to even live in there.”

“You seem to take these native observations quite seriously,” Simon observed. 

Lord Vortrene shrugged and looked embarrassed, “I’ve tried to better understand the culture since I’ve arrived here. I’m merely attentive to the ideas that are whispered about.”

“Mm, well I for one would like to remove the grime of travel from my person before we do anything more. Is the embassy close by,” Lady Alys asked.

She did look worn out, Ivan thought noting her slightly unkempt hair. Not that it affected her manners in any way. 

“Another few minutes, Milady,” Lord Vortrene promised.

It was obviously not common for visitors to a planet to stay at the embassy of their planet. But due to the low flow of Barrayarans staying on planet coupled with the recent foreigner killings ImpSec had hysterically requested that the three of them stay behind well guarded gates. Yes, it would be bad if the camp stool, the former chief of ImpSec and the emperor’s head of social affairs was murdered in their sleep by proles who didn’t know their strategic value, Ivan decided They had taken ImpSec’s request to heart and so they would be staying in the embassy’s safe albeit unassuming rooms. 

Ivan looked out the windows as they drove through the city, “how come none of the shops have doors on them?”

Indeed, of the store fronts he could see it seemed as if the place was assembled with three walls and a ceiling, or maybe three and a half walls with a gaping area where a Barrayaran store might have a door.

“Hm? Oh, it has something to do with fengshui I think. The RenMa people think it’s unhealthy to breath air that’s circulated around a building, they want the outside air to be able to get in. Of course, they also have incredibly high rates of lung cancer here. It’s likely due to minimal regulations on environmental waste produced by their biggest companies. The stuff just gets released into the air. In some ways it might just be better to wear an oxygen mask at all times. Though the gesture would not be appreciated by officials here,” Lord Vortene explained. 

“Did the Vice-minister develop lung cancer,” Simon inquired.

Ivan thought the question rather morbid. Though it would add another layer, especially since they had no idea what Juinwu had been viceminister of. If it had been energy or environmental regulation then maybe she’d killed herself in expiation? Ivan’s head hurt at the idea.

“No… ah, I see where you’re going. No Vice-minister Cheng was from a poor family from the Beimen desert area. She gradually worked her way up in the Party, that is the central government here, and became Vice-minister of agriculture. Nothing to do with the lung cancer problem. In fact she was widely credited with preventing a second civil war by developing new ways to feed the starving peasants. Mostly by introducing some Betan techniques to the land. But the Beimen area was a location where they were doing nuclear testing many years ago when the RenMa Imperium was worried about being overthrown by the communist People’s party. Their Imperium was attempting to intimidate the rebels with these tests. It didn’t work of course. The emperor and his entire family was slaughtered down to his last peacock. So really the only thing that the Imperium accomplished was to give the people in the area around the Beimen desert extraordinarily high doses of radiation,” Lord Vortrene explained.

“Oh, so the farmer’s daughter grew up to marry a dashing prince… and then killed herself,” Ivan asked, trying to see how this tale fit into traditional Barrayaran folklore. He frowned, surprisingly well actually. Suicide was also an unfortunate hobby of the high Vor.

“Hardly that I imagine. You said that Major TieXue Cheng had a nasty temper,” Lady Alys inquired.

“Yes. Actually as I understand it the union between the two was entirely political. She gave him two sons from a uterine replicator and they have never shared the same bed room as I’ve heard it,” Lord Vortrene explained.

Then he paused, then Lord Vortrene felt compelled to mention, “TieXue Cheng has been investigated and cleared of any wrong-doing in relation to his wife. Which doesn’t mean anything since his entire family is made of high ranking members in the Party. But I personally do not think he would do anything to harm the Party and he would grudgingly admit that his wife was very useful.”

The conversation changed as their car entered the Barrayaran compound and drove up. Lord Vortrene showed each of them to their rooms. Ivan imagined that the man had literally no other Barrayaran subjects on planet to deal with if he was taking this much time with them. That or he was still suspicious and expected them to give him a performance review before the end of this.


	5. Chapter 5

Lady Alys took the lead and called the commconsole number for Major TieXue Cheng’s residency only to be curtly told that he would see them no earlier than tomorrow evening. She was not even allowed to speak to the man himself, instead a servant relayed the message.

“I understand that different cultures may have different ideas of what is acceptable behavior but that man is remarkably rude,” Lady Alys declared.

Lord Vortrene shrugged and smiled apologetically, “I’m afraid the people here go back and forth between admiring and condemning foreigners. I can tell you I frequently get stopped by school girls who ask to take a picture with me. Then I go into a store and things are marked up 300% because supposedly all foreigners are wealthy. Which, to be fair, isn’t a lie considering how well even the Barrayaran mark does against the RenMa kuai.”

Lady Alys merely looked more offended.

 

The next evening they drove out to Major TieXue’s residence which was located some forty miles outside the city. It was a rather abrupt drop off between inhabited and uninhabited areas Ivan decided. He had thought there would at least be some sprawling suburbs as they drove along but it seemed that as soon as the apartment complexes ended there was nothing but trees and brown grass. 

“It looks a little nicer here during the rainy season which starts in a few weeks. At the moment we’re in a bit of a drought,” Lord Vortrene promised.

“Are there usually so few vehicles on the road,” Simon asked. 

It was true, heading into or out of a major city Ivan had expected that they would be crawling through traffic. Instead they were racing along at a good clip. 

“Yes, ground and aircars are considered a luxury for the wealthy here. Most people walk, bike or rely on public transportation. Supposedly it’s because the Chairman Ji XunLi believes in cutting down on energy consumption and encouraging exercise for the populace. But rumor is that when the losers for the most recent civil war realized they had no chance of winning they blew up several energy production centers before being gruesomely executed. Couple that with the period after the revolution in which children were condemning their parents as “secret agents supporting Western influence” and anyone with an education being hanged as a traitor and well, you have a community that has no one to rebuild after everything was torn down,” Lord Vortrene explained. 

They stopped to allow a man riding a large animal that looked like a blue bull on steroids cross the road with his herd of tinier, equally blue calves. 

“Do they still eat animals here too,” Ivan asked watching this.

“Mm some of them do, again, it tends to be a niche for the ultra wealthy. Which is why you will notice that the herder is carrying a rapid fire plasma arc. Along with the police force and guards in hospitals and banks, these fellows are one of the few civilian groups allowed to carry weapons,” Lord Vortrene explained.

“That doesn’t seem like it keeps with communist principles,” Ivan noted with a frown.

“No. But neither does the regime in general. Which was why that civil war started in the first place. The lower classes started hearing about what it was like on Beta and suddenly they were no longer content with their lot. A pro-democracy force got fed up with the fact that elected officials weren’t elected but put in at the whim of the main party. Now I grant you that there are civil service tests that have to be passed for an individual to be considered for a job as an elected official, but that doesn’t mean the Party leaders were picking the best candidates for the job,” Lord Vortrene said. 

 

They reached the home of Major TieXue in little time. It was a sprawling place in the style of ancient Japan. A wall was built around it and a guard in a gas mask came forward to check their IDs before allowing them to enter.

“The RenMa have been creating some rather nasty chemical weapons, both before the war and after it. A few years back there was a major scandal where one of the old weapons facilities for the pro-democracy front was found. The government found and then managed to lose an entire warehouse full of some aerosolized killer virus called E. Filoviridae. Let’s just say it would be nicer to kill someone infected with that then let them suffer through it and hope they get better,” Lord Vortrene explained as they drove up through the house past more heavily armed guards in gas masks.

“Is there no treatment for it,” Lady Alys asked.

Lord Vortrene shook his head, “though it’s believed that the government didn’t actually lose it. They were being pressured by the Cetagandans, their language cousins and neighbors to share it in exchange for aid in rebuilding. The RenMa took the aid then conveniently forgot to hand over the E. Filoviridae.”

“I’m surprised the Cetagandans let that slide,” Simon said.

“Let’s just say that they’re more privy to what went on during the civil war here than even I am. They know bat-shit crazy when they see it, pardon the language Milady. Frankly the ZRenMa would be more trouble than they were worth to conquer,” Lord Vortrene said.

The car stopped and they exited the vehicle. They were be greeted by a servant in an eastern style suit who bowed to them and led them into the building rough the round doors.   
The servant led them into a sitting room that didn’t look too different from a Barrayaran one as far as Ivan could tell. The man, TieXue Cheng from the vid was seated, straight backed on one of the couches. He was still dressed in his military uniform, just as in the vid. 

The servant introduced them in Choshu, an amalgamation of Korean, Mandarin, Cantonese and just a hint of Taiwanese. It was the unofficial language of RenMa whose official language was plain, Mandarin. 

The servant then dismissed himself for parts unknown. TieXue did not stand for his guests, a calculated insult, Ivan suspected. Or maybe the fellow decided that they were so far below him that he didn’t need to offer basic courtesy, Ivan considered. Instead he waved them over to the two sofas in front of him.

“Please, sit. I had not expected so many of you to come for this little domestic matter,” TieXue said. 

“I should think the sudden announcement that my son has a child that you’ve kept hidden from us for fourteen years is more than just a little domestic matter,” Lady Alys said tartly.

Simon put a hand over hers. 

TieXue’s face remained unchanged at her outburst. He turned to speak to Ivan as if it had never happened. 

“The distance here must have been very arduous for you. Because I could not imagine another reason for this woman to be speaking in such a manner to me,” TieXue said looking at Ivan. But he was clearly addressing Lady Alys’s behavior.

“Well you can imagine that it was a bit of a surprise to be asked to come all this way here. I mean, why did your um, sister even use my DNA,” Ivan asked. He also wondered where the boy was. He considered the immaculate white carpeting around them and the way young boys tended to play. Things didn’t add up. The place was a pristine museum and not a family home.

“The boy was created from DNA from you and my younger sister while she lived on Beat Colony. She was studying medicine there. Our parents were proud. Though I think she should have stayed on planet, since what happened would not have occurred at a sensible RenMa school. You see she was rather in love with a Betan male who rejected her. While I am not fully privy to her thought process, MingXia was created as a sort of thumb in nose to suggest to this Betan that any white male was good enough to be the father of her children. That he was nothing special. While I agree with this, I think she took the statement too far,” TieXue explained.

“Your sister made a child as an insult to a former lover,” Lady Alys asked incredulously.

Never mind the overt racism, Ivan thought.

TieXue shrugged, “she coddled him a great deal as a child. She loved him dearly, perhaps a little too much.” 

“But she died some years ago, did she not,” Simon asked.

“Yes, so my own wife took over. She was fond of Mingxia as well. Perhaps because of his illness she found him irresistible. She was like that. No time for men strong enough to carry themselves, no she enjoyed stooping for the weakling,” TieXue stated.

Ivan studied the man and diagnosed him with a serious case of sour grapes with a walloping dose of superiority complex.

“The boy is ill,” Simon prodded.

TieXue made a face, “feeble minded really. He doesn’t… talk. Though he does talk, I’ve heard him and those psychiatrists my wife found for him claim that it’s a form of post-traumatic stress. He is labelled as “selectively mute”. I think it is merely a ploy on his part to get attention.”

“You mean to argue both that he is too stupid to speak and then to claim that that he is a manipulative mastermind,” Simon asked with a hint of surprise in his voice.

TieXue frowned, “I think he can be both malicious and an idiot, yes.”

“You will have to excuse me for doubting your claims when we have yet to meet the boy,” Lady Alys informed him.

TieXue looked displeased, “you will meet him if and when I decide that it is appropriate. I have not decided that you can actually be of use to me and so I will not introduce you to him until I have made that decision. It would serve you well to speak to me with greater deference if you ever want to see him."

Lady Alys quietly seethed but said no more.

“He is not in the house then, is he,” Simon inquired, though his tone suggested that he knew the answer.

“He is elsewhere at the moment, yes,” TieXue admitted reluctantly.

“Well, I mean we traveled all the way here for this interview, so what did you need to know about us first,” Ivan asked reasonably. He hoped his son was alright and the man wasn’t holding the boy hostage in some dank prison cell. 

TieXue studied Ivan then nodded, “I believe we can discuss this over dinner.”

With that TieXue led them into another room with a long, low table and an indentation in the floor so they could comfortable sit on pillows on the floor and let their lags dangle down a bit. A boy came in then, not Ivan’s son based on the pictures. This one was much bulkier. Not fat, Ivan decided. He looked muscular under his clothes. A black armband tied around his arm. Ivan guessed that the boy, who looked to be about sixteen was one of TieXue’s two sons and that the armband was worn to symbolize that he was still mourning his mother. Ivan glanced back at TieXue and noticed that he wore no such mourning gear. 

The boy handed a bottle of wine to his father. He used two hands to do this and bowed after passing it off.

“My younger son, GuoWai,” TieXue said, both acknowledging and dismissing the boy who took a seat next to TieXue. 

The foreigners all sat on the other side of the table. Conversation was mostly dominated by a monologue where TieXue expounded on “proper Asian children” and denounced “western oriented brats”. He claimed it was a genetic problem that not even good parenting could solve. Ivan suspected this was what the man told himself to explain why he couldn’t get Mingxia to act the way he wanted. The man seemed to have a million excuses for why RenMa was so low on the Betan industrialized Planet index and none of them had to do with actual problems on RenMa. No, it was all linked to the lying Western governments or things beyond the government’s control. 

Ivan looked around the house and took note of the very green back gardens he could see from one window. Well, everyone else might be dealing with a drought, but that was no reason for the Cheng house to not be beautiful, Ivan thought snidely. Not that there weren’t Vor on his own planet who put their luxuries over the needs of the people in their district. But none of them had even been in charge of his kid. Lord Vortrene had also warned them that TieXue’s family was high up in the government and that if it came to a court battle the RenMa government would undoubtedly side with TieXue over them. Ivan may never even get to see the boy. He bit his lip and tried to be on his best behavior even as the jackass rattled on. 

They were served soup and then later a chef came out with another dish. Odd, Ivan thought, until the man pulled back the cover and revealed a still living, flopping fish. Well, alright, not flopping, the poor bastard had a chopstick driven between its face and tail and in between that there were fileted bits of fish which lay on top. But the fish was still breathing because its mouth was moving and it twitched, a full body hop now and again.

Lord Vortrene went pale and said something politely to TieXue in Choshu. 

TieXue scoffed, “this is Ikizukuri, live sashimi! It is a delicacy here. I was told that you Barrayarans have strong stomachs. You’ll need them if you plan on talking to Mingxia. Come now, don’t disrespect me by not trying it.”

With that TieXue reached over and took a piece of the fish’s fileted body. His son was the next person to try some. 

“You know it is traditional to leave the head still attached whenever eating fish here. It’s meant to symbolize that you’ll have good luck from beginning to end,” TieXue explained.

“Really, well this poor bastard didn’t seem to have such good luck,” Ivan blurted before he could stop himself.

Surprisingly TieXue didn’t get angry. He laughed.

“You are right, luck has nothing to do with it. It’s a question of fitness. I am stronger, faster and better than this fish, so I will devour it. That is because it is weaker than me. I decide its fate,” TieXue explained.

Simon after a moment reached over calmly clasped a piece of fileted fish. He brought it to his mouth and ingested it as if he were sitting back at home at a table eating at a dinner prepared by Ma Kosti. Then he spoke, looking calmly up at TieXue and showing no response to the still flopping food in front of them.

“Did Mingxia run away,” Simon asked.

A silence. GuoWai dropped his head and tensed, as if waiting for an outburst from his father. 

“After my wife decided that living was too difficult she took the easy way out and killed herself. Some say she was terminally ill, but I think she simply didn’t want to try anymore. She wasn’t strong enough to keep fighting. Well she killed herself fin the KiNoUmi with all the other cowards and undoubtedly suffers the same fate that they do now.”

“And what fate is that,” Simon asked.

“These people who commit suicide are full of such anger and hatred towards the world. When they die they can’t get rid of these last, intense emotions so instead of being freed to pass on to the next life they are trapped here on earth in a hell of their own making,” TieXue explained.

“Is Mingxia dead,” Ivan asked horrified.

TieXue shook his head, “no, but he stole one of my son’s camping tents and is apparently serenading the ghosts of the KiNoUmi. I had thought this foolishness would come to an end on its own. But it’s been four and a half months now and people have started leaving him offerings like he’s a damned boddhi satva.”

Tiexue pounded his fist on the table. The fish continued to flop around and Ivan wondered if there was an appropriate way to put it out of its misery. He snatched a look at his mother who looked a little green. 

“So you know where the boy is. But you decided to leave him there,” Simon asked.

TieXue used his chopsticks to grab another piece of fish before speaking, “it would be embarrassing to my family and I to have to forcibly drag the boy out of those woods. More than that I would not risk them in dealing with any possible bad elements that are housed in those woods.”

“So that’s why you contacted Ivan and that’s why we’re eating live fish now is it,” Simon asked.

TieXue frowned, “I do not care for your tone, foreigner.”

“I don’t particularly care for this meal. Nor do I particularly care for your attitude or for the fact that a fourteen year old boy is living in the middle of a forest full of corpses and you’re too afraid to get him,” Lady Alys declared.

A silence followed her outburst and Ivan couldn’t tell if TieXue was preparing to throw them out or have them arrested.

“It is dark out now. We will go tomorrow,” TieXue declared.

“You can wait until tomorrow, but I’m going to find my grandson tonight,” Lady Alys stated. With that she got up from the table and headed for the door. 

She must be astronomically angry if she was breaking rules of etiquette left and right like this, Ivan decided. Of course, maybe she thought that she didn’t owe TieXue even basic courtesy after this fish thing. Ivan got up to follow her. Lord Vortrene who had been silent throughout the meal and had managed to eat some of the fish was looking particularly conflicted.

“Wait,” TieXue roared. 

Lady Alys turned around and raised one eyebrow carefully. Even now, not a single hair was out of place on her.

“My men and I will go with you,” TieXue said.

His son murmured something pleadingly to him but TieXue responded harshly in Choshu. 

It took time for TieXue to locate a group of men to accompany them on this outing. They took two cars, TieXue had them ride in their own embassy car while he rode in another car with his son. The foreigners, as he insisted on calling them, were left to themselves.


	6. Chapter 6

“I should warn you that Major TieXue is not likely to hand the boy over to you after you’ve found him. Nor does he intend to take your desires into consideration,” Lord Vortrene noted.

“Well we won’t be worried about his considerations either then,” Lady Alys stated firmly.

On RenMa, driving at night was not theoretically dangerous for the passengers of a car since they were ensconced in a metal death machine. But any possibly pedestrians had to be careful, Ivan decided. There were no lights on the roads as they drove, only the headlights of the car. Fortunately the roads were relatively well paved. Ivan spotted no illuminated residences though.

“There are probably houses out there, but due to government restrictions on electricity they won’t have their lights on without good reason,” Lord Vortrene explained.

“This is a hell of a planet,” Ivan muttered.

“Hm, and considering that they have never been cut off from the other planets as we were it leads to some questions about human nature here,” Lord Vortrene agreed.

Silence, as they drove.

“I should note that Major TieXue’s concerns about the forest are not at all abnormal for this culture. Suicide is considered an especially bad way to go since they have certain funeral rites that need to be performed on a person’s body before the sun goes down. If not, then the suicide will supposedly rise up during the night while screaming and searching for company. They don’t want to be alone. It used to be a job for the Buddhist priests here to stay overnight with the bodies so they wouldn’t be alone. But the Party has gone back to its “no religion” stance once more. All the Buddhist priests who were in the government’s employment in order to perform this nasty little function have been fired. People remain left to deal with their own dead,” Lord Vortrene explained. 

Lady Alys shook her head and massaged her temples.

“If you’re feeling sick I have more meds, maman,” Ivan offered tentatively.

“Thank you dear, but my headache is due to this insanity around us and not some physiological response, simple as that might be to cure,” Lady Alys assured him.

“Is there a cultural explanation for why Mingxia would run off to these woods? You say it’s where his aunt killed herself,” Simon asked after a time. 

Lord Vortrene considered this, “Filial piety is positively viewed here and Confucianism is infused into many aspects of life. Traditional Confucian death rituals required that the son should mourn his deceased father by wearing sackcloth and living in a simple hut for three years near the site of his father’s grave. The party has attempted to modernize Confucius's teaching by making them more gender neutral. It's likely that MingXia is carrying out his own version of these death rituals.”

They sat in silence, digesting this information.

“So… is the site of Mingxia’s aunts grave inside the forest? Wouldn’t her husband TieXue want her to be buried elsewhere,” Ivan asked.

“The annual removal of suicides from the forest happens about once a year and won’t occur until the QingMing festival in another two months. TieXue did not strike me as a man who would go in and cut his wife’s body down to give her a proper burial,” Lord Vortrene observed.

“You think Mingxia’s in there… just like, mourning his aunt,” Ivan asked. The picture of some little kid hanging out in the woods with a bunch of hanging corpses freaked him out. Why couldn’t things ever be easy for him, Ivan silently lamented.

Lord Vortrene shrugged, “perhaps, I guess we won’t know until we get there. Though the woods are vast so I’m unsure about how we will even find the boy.”

They arrived at a simple parking lot at the edge of the woods. There seemed to be a large metal dumpster with no obvious opening present and two cars there. Two people, an older couple, seemed deep in the middle of some ritual at the edge of the woods. Ivan caught sight of a holo-vid that was playing on loop in front of them of a college age girl. Their daughter, he guessed. They had set out what looked to be snacks, probably her favorites. Ivan supposed it wasn’t so different from some of Barrayar’s funeral customs. But it still made him squeamish. 

TieXue stepped over and spoke to them. They responded to his inquiry with their heads bowed, an obvious sign of deference to his higher social status. They talked for a few moments, the woman occasionally becoming tearful. Then the couple pointed out some wrapped up foods left in a little container with a note attached.

“The note indicates that the food there is an offering to the Zashiki-warashi. Erm, it’s a type of ghost here that comes in the form of a child. They’re supposed to be good luck. This couple is telling TieXue that they’ve heard that the woods are newly inhabited with this ghost whose been keeping the more restless spirits at peace by playing songs for them. They’re grateful because they think that their troubled daughter can finally reach some peace,” Lord Vortrene translated quietly to them.

“But that’s not a ghost is it, that’s Mingxia,” Ivan said. Was that why TieXue didn’t dare drag the boy out? Would people be angry with him for it? It seemed that people here took their superstitions seriously and they might well get even with TieXue for messing with a good thing, Ivan thought.

Lord Vortrene nodded but turned back when TieXue flew into a rage and kicked over the container. He was however careful not to touch the other snacks or items left near the edge of the woods. Those snacks were undoubtedly meant for people who weren’t coming back to pick them up. 

The couple looked frightened and angry.

The woman shouted things as her husband dragged her back to their vehicle and they drove off.

TieXue took time to regain his composure, then he turned back to Lady Alys and gestured to the woods. Ivan strained his ears and thought he heard music, a slow song played on a string instrument. It sounded a bit like someone playing a solo on a cello. 

“Well, you wanted to come here in the dark. Go on, go find your grandson,” TieXue said.

“You’re not even coming in,” Lady Alys asked.

“My men and I will wait here to catch him in case you flush him out,” TieXue promised.

“Coward,” Lady Alys murmured. She glanced to Lord Vortrene, “I trust you have some lights for us to use?”

Lord Vortrene bowed slightly and retrieved them from the trunk of the car along with a string. 

“There are no large predators to worry about in these woods. But the canopy blocks out the sky so you can’t tell east from west here and it’s easy to get lost. So like Theseus in the lair of the minotaur we will be tying a string at the beginning of this maze so we can get back,” Lord Vortrene explained.

Lord Vortrene handed lights out to each of them. Ivan reminded himself that he was afraid of small, dark spaces, not merely dark ones. Nope, not even when the trees grew weird, he told himself. He was assuredly not afraid, he was just here for his pipsqueak and then they could steal the boy, run like hell back to Barrayar and never ever have to worry about a corpse forest ever again. 

They headed silently through the woods, the mysterious music was the only hint as to where the boy might be. The dried leaves rustled and crunched under their booted feet as the sky disappeared overhead. It was covered up by the canopy of the trees who stretched out their gnarled branches among the little party. 

Yes, Ivan decided, the trees definitely grew weird here, not straight up and down but sort of twisty and bendy. It seemed thoroughly unnatural. Ivan saw that there were other strings that they passed by.

“More travelers this time of night,” Simon inquired.

“People who come here are sometimes ambivalent about death, so they also leave rope behind in case they change their minds,” Lord Vortrene explained shortly. 

They came across their first body not long after that. It was slumped over next to a tree. Ivan looked up to see his mother’s reaction, but she didn’t shriek or gasp like other vor ladies might. She took it in silently and when Simon touched her gently on the shoulder she turned away and followed after him. Ivan was surprised that the body didn’t smell worse, but then the air here was rather dry.

“That’s a little unusual, typically people hang themselves here. But it looks like that one killed himself with a prescription drug overdose,” Lord Vortrene said. Perhaps he was nervous and wanted to fill the silence, Ivan thought. Or maybe he was trying to freak them out more than they already were. 

Ivan turned when he saw something out of his peripheral vision. But when he flashed his light that way there was nothing there. Damn, no wonder TieXue never came in here, this place really might be haunted, Ivan thought. He was not going to embarrass himself in front of his mother, he promised. He was not. They just needed to find the pipsqueak, grab him and drag him out of this godforsaken hellhole. 

The funeral dirge they’d been listening to ended and after a brief pause where the player might have taken time to take a sip of water a much jauntier tune began. It contrasted sharply with the woods around them but at least it was something Ivan could whistle to. 

“You know I think it’s coming from down there,” Ivan noted indicating the steep drop off on their right. Not that he could see anyone or anything down that way.

“Yes… though how to circle around and get down that way could be difficult,” Lord Vortrene hypothesized.

Ivan considered his companions. While Simon was fit for a well, sixty year old man, he really wasn’t going to be climbing down any ravines. Nor was Ivan’s mother, and Lord Vortrene seemed more at home in a library than the fields. Circling would take time and the kid might run off by then. It might be better to scale down the side and catch the little guy now than to wait.   
Ivan turned to one of the three guards Vortrene had brought with him.

“You want to get out of here some time tonight?”

The man nodded.

It took them several minutes to set up a belay line down to the bottom of the ravine.

“Be careful Ivan,” his mother warned with a frown.

Perhaps it was a testament to her own unease with the forest that allowed her to watch him do this without a more in depth safety lecture first.

As Ivan and the guard Yonatan, climbed down Ivan was sure they were closer to the ghostly music than before. They made their way forwards slowly. 

He caught a glimpse of a little clearing and a bright orange tent. A little fire was even going and Ivan caught sight of a small figure sitting on the ground in front of a long wooden instrument with strings that ran across it. The pipsqueak had paused in his play to get up and open up a bag nearby which seemed to hold brightly covered beverages.

Well, at least he’s not starving Ivan decided heading towards the half-pint. 

What did one say to one’s son upon first meeting him, especially in a forest full of corpses? Ivan chewed his lip as he thought of things to say. Hi, beautiful night isn’t it, I mean besides the freaky looking trees. No. Hey sport, how about we go get some dinner, I promise no live fish? Hm, probably not. How about we leave your crazy uncle behind? Maybe.  
Ivan was so intent on this discussion and his torn desire to talk to the boy or to let his mother take care of it he didn’t notice the slightly uplifted tree root. 

He went sprawling onto the ground and let out a loud swear word. The boy had sat down by his instrument once more and had been preparing to start playing again. But he paused now and turned in the direction of Ivan and Yonatan.

Yonatan who seemed caught between doing nothing and trying to get them out of the forest quickly became overly excited.

“I’ve got him,” he roared launching into a run straight toward MingXia’s campsite.

MingXia panicked and scrambled to his feet before running off into the woods. Ivan swore again thinking about how much more difficult this would be now that he would undoubtedly be dealing with a screaming, possibly biting child. He followed after Yonatan who was fast on the boys heels. 

He followed Yonatan’s trail away from the fire and into the darkness beyond it. They didn’t travel very far before Ivan nearly ran into Yonatan who was looking around now.

“I don’t know where he went,” Yonatan admitted sheepishly.

Ivan twisted around scanning the area. What the hell had the boy been wearing? Ivan racked his brains.  
Right, dark green pants against a dark top, great. 

 

Ivan uttered another loud angry string of swear words that his mother would surely disapprove of if she were here.

A slight rustling of the bushes was the only indication that someone was listening. But it was enough, Ivan spotted the boy’s pale face as he bolted. Ivan followed in pursuit.  
It didn’t help that the branches of trees tried to grab him and the roots stuck up and out to trip him. He was sure he could grab the kid if not for this demon possessed forest.

“Hey, little buddy, just slow down. I’m not going to hurt you, I just want to talk to you,” Ivan called out cheerfully. 

That didn’t help. It only made the kid run faster. Though Ivan admitted to himself, even as he labored to just keep up with the little sprite that was his son, that he probably wouldn’t stop for anyone he met in this forest at night. 

The kid casually cleared an overturned log even as he ducked under a branch just over it. Ivan jumped the log but got caught in the tree. He was too damn big for this place. That or the woods really were out to get him. 

But fortune still smiled on him as he saw the lone street light from the parking lot. Yes! The boy had knowingly or otherwise led them out of the place.

As Ivan disentangled himself from the tree and continued forward he heard a sharp cry of pain. He managed to reach the asphalt in time to catch TieXue standing casually over the boy, Ivan’s son.

“Oh, you caught him,” Ivan called out. With your fist it seems, Ivan added silently as he noticed the way one of the boy’s hands flew to his face in a protective gesture even as he tried to scramble back.

Ivan didn’t like calling attention to himself. But he was also concerned about TieXue hurting the boy. Ivan only had one pipsqueak, hopefully. He figured he should take care of his son. That meant not letting the kid get beaten to a pulp before Ivan even got a chance to talk to him.

Ivan moved forward towards the close knit group of men. He watched the boy scramble to his feet and TieXue grab him. 

But TieXue wasn’t paying attention to Ivan and neither was MingXia. TieXue said something low, guttural and unpleasant sounding to the boy in Choshu. It was a disturbing image in the near darkness, this large hulking man, pulling this scrawny kid close to him. Ivan couldn’t help wondering if he’d done more harm than good by finding the boy.

“Hi, MingXia is it? I’m your…” he paused wondering how he should refer to himself. Was Da or Dada too familiar? How about father? Or sperm donor? 

Of course while Ivan was considering this MingXia tried to break out of TieXue’s grasp and ended up with a face full of asphalt when the large man easily knocked him to the ground. 

The kid tried to pick himself up again but TieXue wasn’t so patient this time, he grabbed the boy’s longish hair and yanked him up.

The man had twelve guards and a son of his own watching this and not one moved in to stop this.

“Hey,” Ivan said, finally reaching the group. He latched on to TieXue’s hand, the one that was also holding the boy.

“Relax, he’s just a kid. There’s no need for,” Ivan began but was cut off.

When Ivan caught his hand, TieXue let go of the boy who ducked away. TieXue brought up his other hand to grab Ivan. They grappled, each trying to subdue the other opponent. Ivan was disadvantaged by the simple fact that he didn’t really want to horribly maim his opponent; not that Ivan would mind giving TieXue a few good bruises for being an ass. But Ivan felt awkward about it knowing that TieXue’s son GuoWai was watching. 

Ivan had been careful to keep up his recruiter ad appearance even on ship and he’d certainly done some hand to hand combat with the boys on ship. He even won a couple times too. But apparently TieXue was also in the habit of practicing unarmed combat and he had a ruthlessness that Ivan lacked. 

A well placed knee to the groin and Ivan was on the ground.

“Don’t ever meddle in my affairs waiguoren,” TieXue hissed at Ivan.

“Major Cheng, what are you doing,” Ivan’s mother demanded. Ivan turned to see her and the others across the parking lot. They were rapidly moving in the direction of Ivan and the unstable Major Cheng.

Ivan couldn’t tell if he should be overjoyed or worried for their safety. He considered how close TieXue’s boot was to his face and decided he wouldn’t complain. He would however, move the hell out of the way.

Ivan scooted himself back and slowly, painfully managed to get to his feet. He glanced over to see MingXia cursing and swearing and trying like hell to get out of the arms of one of his uncle’s armed guards.

“Major Cheng, I don’t understand,” Lord Vortrene began. It seemed to Ivan that there was little to understand and Vortrene couldn’t be that obtuse. But then he realized that the diplomat might have to deal with TieXue and his wrath on a more frequent basis than Ivan ever would.

“I am collecting my nephew, a minor in the eyes of the People’s Republic, and am taking him home,” TieXue stated.

“No,” the boy howled.

Ivan couldn’t imagine what the hell had given this man the idea that the kid couldn’t talk.

“Wait but I-“ Ivan began.

At a signal from TieXue each of his bodyguards pulled out lethal plasma arcs.

Ivan flinched backwards.

“You may go now,” TieXue stated calmly.

“No, we will not,” Lady Alys declared firmly. Simon already had a restraining hand on her shoulder. But she continued, “surely you are not such a coward that you would threaten unarmed civilians such as ourselves when all we wish to do is visit with my son’s child.”

TieXue glared at her.

“Major Cheng, please, I don’t mean to lecture you, but the Party is built around the family unit. Surely you can respect that even if Lord Vorpatril is a foreigner he is still the boy’s father and Confucius wrote most seriously about the importance of the relationship between fathers and sons,” Lord Vortrene put in, attempting to placate the situation.

“Shi wo de baba ma? Ta kan qilai baichi,” MingXia muttered

Ivan had no idea what the kid was saying, but even in the moonlight the boy looked pissed. That was likely because he was bleeding from his nose and was being held by one of his uncle’s thugs.

“You know you shouldn’t worry, everything is going to be just fine, MingXia,” Ivan tried to reassure the boy in English.

The boy responded with an outburst of profanity in Russian. It was actually a decent accent, Ivan decided even as he glanced back to see if his mother keeled over from the words. 

The gesture was unnecessary. Lady Alys’s eyebrows rose, but she remained firmly on her feet.

“You hear that, even your son isn’t interested in you foreigner, you’ve done your job, go home,” TieXue insisted heading back to his groundcar. His own son and Mingxia in tow.

“I can’t imagine how embarrassing this would be if your Chairman was informed that you needed us to find your nephew. It seems you can’t keep your own home in order. Perhaps it would suggest that you couldn’t be helpful in keeping your other affairs in order either,” Simon mused aloud.

“You have no proof that I ever requested you, the documents for allowing your persons unto the planet have been destroyed. You don’t currently have status here. Just be glad I have not pointed this out to local law enforcement or you might spend a great deal of time in a very small cell. The Party is not kind to its enemies, especially foreign spies,” TieXue instructed.

“Too bad you mentioned that aloud, now we have it on vid pick up,” Simon stated, smiling grimly.

TieXue paused and turned around to see that yes, the little red light was blinking to show that it was recording on a vid pickup which Simon had hidden in his great coat and which he now revealed.

“Don’t bother murdering us and trying to destroy the evidence. The vid is to be automatically sent to two of your political rivals: Jang Qing and Bo XiLian unless I personally stop it with a code to be entered form a commconsole at the Barrayaran Embassy. Do you want you and your family to be totally humiliated,” Simon demanded.

TieXue’s eyes narrowed, “You are… smarter than I thought foreigner. Very well, arrive at my residence tomorrow morning and we will discuss who will take custody of MingXia.”

TieXue turned away again. His own son and MingXia had already been placed in one of the ground cars. Ivan assumed the sounds he was hearing were from his son swearing.

“We can’t let him get away with this,” Ivan said a mix of anger and despondence in his voice as he watched TieXue and his gang drive away.

Lady Alys looked similarly pained but she spoke, “TieXue likely thinks he has still won. I’m sure that he’s attempting to buy himself time to build a case against us. We need to also be planning how to get MingXia out of here.”

Illyan nodded.  
Lord Vortrene turned to Ivan, “I’m sorry this happened to you lord Vorpatril. I’m afraid the macho culture is alive and well even here and TieXue Cheng is an embodiment of the belief that men should spend a majority of their time drinking and studying martial arts.”

“Well the drinking part I get,” Ivan said, resisting the urge to rub the still aching body part. His mother would probably scold him.

“Where did the boy learn those Russian swear words though? You think they get Russian vids here,” Ivan asked.

Lady Alys’s eyebrows rose, “why Ivan, he was only repeating the same words you were using when in the KiNoUmi. I gather he overheard you.”

“That was quick thinking on your part Simon, do you really have the vid pickup set up like that,” Ivan asked as they headed back to their own car.

“Yes… your lady-mother and I were discussing the possible responses of Major Cheng earlier and decided that we needed leverage of our own,” Simon admitted.

Ivan wondered silently if Simon was also worried that he would forget whatever the secret code to stop the vids from being sent. His mother was assuredly Simon’s secret keeper if anyone was. But he couldn’t help feeling a twinge of irritation at the pair of them for leaving him out of the discussion on how to look after his pipsqueak. It was as if they were taking care of two children on this trip and Ivan was a full grown man thank you very much. It wasn’t like he still lived with his mother. Though he admitted that he did live in an apartment owned by his mother. But that was different he reasoned.

“Why didn’t you tell me and why didn’t we haggle for more than just the chance to see the kid tomorrow,” Ivan asked.

“Patience is a virtue, dear,” Lady Alys stated but said no more.

“A man like TieXue would take any questioning of his authority as a direct insult and would revoke his invitation. Pushing him too hard might get him to refuse us visitations to MingXia and he would likely argue that any vids sent to his rivals were doctored tapes set up by Western Spies or some such nonsense,” Lord Vortrene put in.

Ivan frowned. He didn’t like it. But he supposed he was going to have to live with it. At least for the night.


	7. Chapter 7

Ivan didn’t sleep well that night, knowing that TieXue was probably none too thrilled with MingXia after he ran away. He hadn’t liked the idea of the little guy going back with TieXue knowing that the man didn’t have a problem with hitting little kids. But he figured that he wasn’t going to convince Simon to go in and grab the kid tonight. He wondered uneasily how often Simon had been forced to abandon good men in enemy territory without the hope of recovering them. Ivan hoped Simon wouldn’t be that cold blooded with Ivan’s son. But he suspected that if it came down to it, Simon would make sure that Lady Alys and Ivan got off planet safely even if they did have to leave the boy behind. Ivan was determined not to let that happen. 

He didn’t say this to Simon as they drove along the road to the Cheng residence. Like yesterday there were few cars on the road and the gate guards wore gas masks. They drove up to the front of the residence and were greeted by a servant who brought them inside.

TieXue was seated on his veranda, overlooking the gardens and watching as a group of men, servants, worked hard to clear what appeared to be a garden.

TieXue did not rise, nor did he ask them to sit as he gazed out. Calmly he brought a cup to his mouth and drank, based on the color and the steam coming off of it Ivan guessed it was tea.

“It is most wonderful when everyone knows their place,” TieXue stated, not bothering to look at them.

“In that case one might imagine that MingXia’s place was with his father,” Lady Alys stated sharply.

TieXue looked Lady Alys over, he showed clear disdain and irritation for her.

“Perhaps we should sit once more in the family room. I will have the boys come down,” TieXue stated.

With that he gave orders to his attending servants.

“I have personally obtained tickets off planet for you which are set to remove you from my sight in exactly six days. You will take them, and be glad I don’t have you jailed as spies. I have also obtained several witnesses who will swear that the recordings you took of me were doctored by my political rivals to make me look foolish. This will be enough, as your word will mean nothing in RenMa court,” TieXue explained briskly.

They arrived at the same table they’d eaten at yesterday.

Minutes later the boys came down. Ivan had to stop himself from flinching when he saw his son. The kid had bruises on his face and from the way he was walking Ivan knew TieXue hadn’t stopped there. The long hair from last night was also gone, undoubtedly due to TieXue. The boys sat down with GuoWai next to his father and MingXia next to GuoWai and across from Ivan. MingXia didn’t look at anyone as he sat down.

He was a scrawny kid with short cropped hair and Ivan’s olive skin. He hadn’t had short hair last night, Ivan realized. So was this sudden removal the boy’s idea or TieXue’s? Ivan suspected he knew the answer and didn’t like it.

“MingXia, come, say something nice to your Barrayaran family as this will be the last time you will be seeing them. They came here to bring you back to me and now they are going,” TieXue explained in English.

“That, is a lie,” Lady Alys stated harshly.

“That you brought him back to me or that you are leaving? Because I know that both of these facts are true,” TieXue stated signaling for food to be brought.

“Is it also true that you had to ask them to come because you were afraid of the dark? I’m sure the Party leadership would be embarrassed to here that you had to import courage,” MingXia said softly in English. The boy glanced defiantly over at his uncle.

TieXue did not have a problem with hitting little kids, Ivan reminded himself as he watched the big man get up. Guys like this usually came with big egos that bruised easily, Ivan recognized. What had Vortrene said last night? 

“Hey,” Ivan said slamming his hands down on the table to distract TieXue from further beating the snot out of the kid.

TieXue glanced at Ivan, he seemed ready for Ivan to challenge him to a fight. Of course Ivan’s balls reminded him that maybe fist fighting with TieXue was a bad idea. The man had no compunctions about fighting dirty. 

“I – you know what this situation needs? Well when good things happen on Barrayar we drink. Like, like finding your son or reuniting with family, you know good stuff. So um, do you do that here too,” Ivan asked.

TieXue raised an eyebrow at this. Ivan could also see Simon and his mother studying him sideways from their own vantage points. Maybe they had a plan for getting the pipsqueak out of this. But if they did then Ivan hadn’t heard it, and he was tired of being left out of the loop.

TieXue however seemed interested in Ivan’s comments, the Major even permitted himself to smile and he waved a servant over. A moment later the servant returned with a bottle.

“This is Baijiu, white wine. It may be a little too strong even for you,” TieXue stated as he opened the bottle. The servant came back with a set of little glasses, little ornate shot glasses, Ivan decided. 

The servant poured out cups for Ivan, Lord Vortrene, Illyan and TieXue. 

TieXue glanced at his son who watched his father with a longing look on his face.

“Perhaps when you’re older and you’ve proven yourself to me, you can drink with us too,” TieXue said a little too smugly.

“Not that you’d know courage if it bit you in the ass,” MingXia said with no attempt to lower his voice.

Ivan caught TieXue’s arm as the man lurched to his feet.

“Hey, hey, come on don’t listen to the pipsqueak. Sit down let’s um, let’s…. let’s have a toast to erm, family. I mean we did just find my son right, that’s worth celebrating, right,” Ivan suggested.

“This little sewer rat is hardly worth toasting to,” TieXue said glaring at the boy who glared back. 

Damn but the boy needed to learn a little self preservation, between hiding in a corpse forest and antagonizing a violent uncle. MingXia was not likely to make it to his majority at this rate, Ivan decided. 

“We could take him off your hands,” Simon offered smoothly.

TieXue snorted, “I couldn’t do that, you’d be begging to return him in a few days.”

“Try me,” Ivan offered.

“No,” TieXue declared.

“Dog,” MingXia said.

“One of these days I might not be able to control my temper, and then you’ll be dead. Is that what you want,” TieXue asked quietly as he turned to look at MingXia.

“That is hardly how you talk to a child,” Lady Alys reprimanded.

“Hey, I have a great idea. Since you’ve already arranged for us to get kicked off planet in six days, what’s wrong with us spending time with the kid,” Ivan asked.

“He’s already got your damned perverted genes running through his body. He’s barely smart enough to live, I’ll not have you corrupting him any further,” TieXue said firmly.

“Why dear uncle, is this your first expression of humility? Are you saying that you might not be able to undo any damage the bad foreigner does,” MingXia asked in mock surprise.

“It may be that you are too broken for anyone to make anything of, that you need to be cast out with the rest of the garbage,” TieXue informed his nephew.

“I could play you for the kid, like with a drinking game,” Ivan suggested.

“Oh, Ivan,” his mother murmured beside him, already burying her hands in her face.

He wanted to protest, he was sure this would work. Unless TieXue also knew a few bar games.

“You think you could out drink me,” TieXue asked dubiously.

“Ivan, perhaps we should rethink this strategy,” Simon murmured for his ear alone. Ivan was just surprised that Simon had called him Ivan instead of Ivan you idiot, which was what he would have matched up with the tone Simon was using now. The tone that said Ivan was behaving like an elephant in a minefield and was likely to blow himself and everyone else to pieces. 

But he wasn’t he wanted to tell them.

“You don’t know what you’re getting into,” TieXue scoffed.

“Sure I do, if there’s one thing I’m good at it is drinking,” Ivan said. His son raised an eyebrow at that.

His mother murmured “Oh Ivan.” 

Ok, maybe he shouldn’t have said that out loud, Ivan decided.

TieXue snorted, “perhaps in your case that’s true.”

“Yeah, well, there’s no shame in being able to hold one’s liquor. So you up for a game or not,” Ivan said.

“You have nothing that I want,” TieXue said simply.

“Which means TieXue’s scared he might lose,” MingXia interpreted.

“I have better things to do than drink with a foreigner,” TieXue said.

“Because that foreigner is better than you at something and you can’t admit it. You are too weak to admit that you’re not the best at something,” MingXia insisted triumphantly.

TieXue ground his teeth. Ivan was pretty sure the kid was going to get it this time.

“You want to see me defeat your hapless father again? Last night wasn’t enough for you to realize that these white devils are little more than animals to us? Good I’ll show you, I know you’re a slow learner,” TieXue bit out.

“Well, well if I win we get to take the kid out every day until we leave. And you can’t hit him while we’re still on planet,” Ivan added.

TieXue shrugged, “Explain this game to me first. Then perhaps I will agree to it. ”

Ivan didn’t like the way TieXue glared at MingXia. 

“I hope you know what you’re doing Ivan,” Simon said for Ivan’s ear alone.

Ivan swallowed.

“Alright, it’s a simple game, if you’re man could just bring me three bigger cups, like oh, yeah those will work,” Ivan said. 

Ivan filled them up with the baijiu. He heard Lord Vortrene mutter something but he didn’t catch it.

TieXue raised an eyebrow, “while you are on vacation, I have work to do and cannot spend all of my day in my cups.”

“Well you won’t have to because these three big cups are mine and these three little cups are yours. Like I said I’m a professional at drinking, so I wanted to give you a fair chance. See I bet I can drink these three cups before you finish those little ones. But I get to start first and finish this first big one before you can start on yours. And neither person gets to touch the other person’s glass. Got it?”

“Is this some kind of trick,” TieXue asked.

“The only trick is that I’m getting some free wine out of this,” Ivan said gleefully.

“It’s not actually wine,” Lord Vortrene murmured. But he did not elaborate.

TieXue shrugged, “Very well, if you win you may take the boy out and I shall wait to discipline him. But if I win you are to leave my house immediately and pester me no further.”  
The boys were staring at him like he’d lost his mind. Simon looked amused, his mother, aghast.

Ivan began, when the liquid hit his throat he realized that he was not in fact drinking wine, that had definitely been a misnomer and whoever had mislabeled this product needed to be taken out and executed. But he finished the cup and successfully put it over one of TieXue’s tiny glasses, effectively blocking the man from starting any of his drinks.   
Ivan finished off the next two cups, stood up, grabbed the boy and headed for the door. At least Ivan tried to, he ran into the floor on his way.

“I still win. No take backs,” Ivan called as Lord Vortrene grabbed one of his arms and Simon took the other. 

Lady Alys shepherded a giggling MingXia out with them.

TieXue did not try to stop them, he only wore a look of shock on his face as if he couldn’t believe a normal person would drink that much in one sitting on an empty stomach.

“You know I had it all planned out,” Ivan declared.

“I see that now,” Simon agreed, amusement apparent in his tone.

“Don’t tell anyone, but I’m a genius,” Ivan stated solemnly. Now if he could just figure out which one of the two Barrayaran embassy vehicles parked out front was the real one…

“I don’t know that anyone would believe me,” Simon said.

“They use Baijiu to clean toilets here,” MingXia cackled, tears running down his face from laughing so hard.

“It is about 40% alcohol,” Lord Vortrene admitted passing Ivan off to Vortrene’s security detail who helped load Ivan into the car.

“Oh Ivan,” Lady Alys sighed. 

“What? It’s not my fault, I was just using all of the resources at my disposal. Miles style,” Ivan defended as he relaxed into the seat.

“Resources? You mean your high alcohol tolerance,” Simon muttered. But he said this for Ivan’s ear only as Simon had no desire to upset Lady Alys anymore than she already was.  
MingXia who had been following along paused as everyone else moved to get into the car. While he’d clearly found it amusing that Ivan had drunk himself silly before breakfast and he seemed pleased to be away from his uncle he now seemed visibly uncertain about embarking on any sort of adventure with his father’s family.

Lady Alys was the first to comment.

“MingXia dear, I am sorry for the dreadful way in which your uncle introduced us. I am Lady Alys Vorpatril, your grandmother. This is my close friend Simon Illyan and this is Lord Vortrene, the ambassador for Barrayar. I know we don’t know each other well. But I promise that we will take good care of you. I think our first order of business will be to head back to the embassy for a proper breakfast and I would like a healthcare professional to look at your… wounds,” Lady Alys stated guiding the boy into the car. 

She was shrewd about it too, putting herself next to one door and Ivan on the other door so he couldn’t make a break for it easily. Lord Vortrene and Simon sat across from them. 

“So you talk,” Ivan stated looking the boy over. He thought about how at the first meeting with TieXue the other man had claimed the boy was mute. But that didn’t seem to be the case. Ivan also thought about how it would be very embarrassing to empty his stomach contents unto the floor of the car. Damn, but maybe he should have haggled TieXue down to two cups each instead of the three. But he’d been worried the other man would think better of it and refuse to play. 

MingXia looked over at Ivan in amusement, “What did you think I would do? Bark like a dog?”

“Your uncle mentioned that you were sent to some psychiatrists because of your selective mutism,” Lady Alys stated carefully.

MingXia shrugged, “He hates it when people don’t respond to him. I gave him the silent treatment for several months and the psychiatrists assumed it was mutism. So he’d threaten to beat me and then auntie JuinWu would step in and tell him that he was being abusive rather than instructive.”

“You purposely made that maniac angry with you? As your father I think I should give you some advice. Which is: don’t do that. That is a bad plan. Stay away from crazy people and do not attract their attention,” Ivan declared firmly.

“It’s hard when you’re related to them,” MingXia complained.

Ivan silently agreed with that. Or loudly agreed based on the looks his mother and Simon gave him. Had Ivan said something? Even he wasn’t sure.

“Well, let me give you some advice,” Ivan began.

 

 

He wasn’t quite sure how long the ride was, but by the end of his very stern paternal lecture MingXia was laughing hysterically again. Simon had gone into more than one coughing fit that might have been him laughing and Lady Alys was merely clutching her head.

“Ivan, that is not at all how babies are made,” Lady Alys stated shaking her head.

“Regardless, we have arrived back at the embassy. I did call ahead to tell them to prepare breakfast for us and a physician is in residence to look at MingXia,” Lord Vortrene reported diplomatically.


	8. Chapter 8

Ivan was given a tablet to soak up the alcohol in his body. The pill wasn’t quite instantaneous. But about half an hour later he was able to walk in a straight line and think clearly.   
He got up off the couch where he’d crashed to locate the rest of his family. They were finishing up breakfast with the ambassador. Well Lady Alys and Simon were done. The kid was still eating like he was scared they’d take the food away from him at any moment.

Lady Alys was the first to notice her son’s arrival.

“Ivan, are you feeling better?”

“Oh, um, yeah lots better,” Ivan admitted sitting down.

Actually he felt pretty good and figured he could even manage to eat something. Damn but why hadn’t those pills been more widely available when he was younger?

No matter, he decided reaching for some toast, and meat, and cheese that was set out in the middle of the table. There was no ikizu- live fish thing here thank you.

“So um, did I miss anything,” Ivan asked glancing around the table.

“We were just talking about how best to spend the day,” Lady Alys explained.

“Oh, any ideas then,” Ivan asked looking at his son.

“mrfenfremenya,” MingXia suggested around some eggs.

“Please don’t talk when your mouth is full dear,” Lady Alys said.

“ChunXi Yuan is open now. Can we go there,” MingXia inquired.

“It’s an amusement park,” Lord Vortrene explained. 

“Oh, well that seems safe enough,” Ivan said.

 

Of course Ivan had some questions about it when they actually arrived. The rides were all garishly colored with obviously new coats of paint. That being said Ivan didn’t trust that the actually machinery under said coats of paint was well maintained. It looked like the rides had been built some fifty years ago and then the engineers and all other maintenance workers were taken out and shot, or shipped off to a forced labor camp. 

Ivan was the only one who went on any of the rides with MingXia. The others were too dignified or too sensible to go up. 

One of the rides, a water thing of sorts made an odd shrieking noise as the seats they were in rose into the air. Ivan wondered what would happen if they got stuck up there.   
At least it wasn’t some indoor ride where they could get stuck in a tunnel Ivan decided as the ride released, on purpose of by accident, and they descended rapidly into a pool of water.

The park itself was of a decent size but few people were actually present to ride anything. 

“Is that because it’s the middle of the day,” Ivan inquired of Lord Vortrene who had followed them along.

Vortrene shook his head, “it’s more a question of resources, but that’s not something we should discuss here.”

Right, because for every family with a child there was one single man or woman who was merely lounging about with darkened goggles on so you couldn’t see where they were looking. The place was infested with secret police it seemed.

Not that this stopped MingXia from having a good time. Nor did it stop him from convincing Ivan to buy snacks along the way. Vortrene himself bought bottled water and suggested the rest of the group do so as well. While there were fountains in abundance present in the park the water they produced smelled strongly of diesel fuel. 

Ivan couldn’t help feeling guilty that in spite of this dilapidated park the kid still seemed to be having a blast.

When I take you back to Barrayar I’ll show you what a real amusement park looks like, Ivan silently promised.

Of course that was a different problem and one that still had to be solved Ivan thought. He glanced back at Simon and Lady Alys who were placidly walking hand in hand, like any other elderly couple who was out for a stroll. They must be madly cooking something up, he thought.

Meanwhile MingXia puked in a trash receptacle.

“I told you not to eat anything before we went on that ride,” Ivan scolded.

MingXia shrugged and pushed Ivan over to a different, equally vomit inducing ride.

Still better than flying with Miles on one of his more suicidal days, Ivan thought. 

The lights in the park suddenly went out and the ride shuddered to a stop while they were upside down hundreds of feet in the air.

It was almost better than riding with Miles. Ivan started to wonder how sturdy their seatbelts were when the ride shuddered back to life and they were able to make it back to the landing platform. 

While Ivan was thanking his lucky stars MingXia was pulling him off to a different ride. Lord Vortrene put a stop to this.

“It looks like we’re going to be dealing with rolling blackouts the rest of the evening. Why don’t we go do something else now, your father must be tired,” Lord Vortrene said.  
As if to prove his point the lights around the park suddenly went out again.

MingXia huffed but didn’t argue.

“We still have to buy flowers at least,” MingXia said.

“Of course,” Lord Vortrene agreed.

“May I ask why,” Lady Alys inquired.

“There is a statue of the high commander, Jung Cao Lun in this park. It’s customary to lay flowers at his feet as a sign of respect for what a lovely park he has built,” Lord Vortrene explained, careful to keep any trace of irony out of his voice. 

So they bought flowers from a vendor and trooped over to the statue. MingXia demonstrated the appropriate half hunched walk that was necessary for approaching and retreating from the statue. The statue already had a multitude of flowers at its feet. 

Ivan supposed that there were citizens of Barrayar who placed flowers at the feet of statues for Dorca the Just as a sign of respect. Still, this seemed like a bizarre practice. It wasn’t like Dorca was ever going to appreciate them.

Ivan followed the boy’s example because it seemed important to the kid who was watching them carefully.

Afterwards they trooped over to a lav in the park just before heading to the groundcar.

Lav was of course a nice way of referring to a pit in the ground. Latrine might be a better word for it. But it wasn’t really a makeshift latrine that had been dug out by some raw recruits out on maneuvers. The structure was made of concrete and looked like it was meant to be permanent. So why this trough style pit without proper running water, he wondered.

Ivan undid his trousers but suddenly grew shy when he glanced over to his side to see the entire row of males, including MingXia, staring at him.

Ivan cleared his throat, “um, is something wrong?”

MingXia looked embarrassed, “well, we didn’t know if your bits looked… different.”

“Well did you expect it to be rectangular or something,” Ivan inquired, managing to keep his irritation in check.

Right, this place was closed off to foreigners so the kid and the rest of these people had probably never seen a white person before. It was like visiting the back country Greekie hicks, he told himself. Was that why Lord Vortrene had decided not to go after all? How was Ivan’s mother handling all of this? Did the women’s side have proper stalls? 

Despite the audience, Ivan managed to relieve himself with as much nonchalance as possible and left the restroom, which would have more aptly been referred to as an indoor pit in the ground.

MingXia followed after.

Lady Alys wordlessly handed out hand sanitizer but was too dignified to actually comment on the state of the facilities. 

After they fed MingXia again and bought him snacks Ivan and his family reluctantly headed back to TieXue’s compound with the boy.

“So… is everything going to be ok with you and your uncle tonight,” Ivan asked in concern.

“Probably. He’s an asshole but he keeps his word,” MingXia said.

“Don’t swear darling, it makes you sound ignorant,” Lady Alys gently rebuked.

“Sorry,” MingXia said, though he did not seem the least bit sorry.

The boy slide out of the car and headed into the house.

The group watched him enter and waited, even after the door closed. Ivan wasn’t sure if Lord Vortrene was waiting for a signal from Lady Alys or Simon. Maybe they were all just waiting to see if the kid came running out again of if someone would get thrown through a window.

Finally, at a small nod from Lady Alys, Lord Vortrene signaled for the driver to go.

“So, how are we supposed to get the pipsqueak off planet,” Ivan inquired.

There was surely plenty of security on this planet and TieXue would do everything in his power to keep the boy, if only out of some misguided pride or sense of duty.

Ivan rubbed his aching head as he tried to figure out an answer.


	9. Chapter 9

They went out to see other sites on the following days. Ivan even managed to accidentally flirt with a yakuza boss. She invited him to become her husband but he politely and fervently declined the offer much to the offense of her bodyguards. Lord Vortrene’s eloquence was tested then in an effort to get Ivan out of that situation.

It would be sad to see them go, MingXia decided as they sat down for breakfast. It was the second to last day that his father’s family would be here. They were set to leave for Barrayar tomorrow evening.

MingXia was only just getting used to eating real meals again as opposed to whatever offerings people left for the forest spirits in the KiNoUmi.

The family was all very stiff today. The conversation had been very jerky and prone to long silences. The adults kept staring at him and for once his grandmother didn’t try to push more food on him.

“I mean, it’s not like anyone is dying. I suppose I can always come visit you guys when I’m older,” MingXia said into another abrupt silence.

His father offered a weak smile, “yeah. I can get a room set up for you and everything.”

Ivan didn’t sound convinced. Maybe he knew that while TieXue still lived MingXia would never visit Barrayar. Still, they didn’t have to be so weird about it, MingXia decided.

That or maybe he was projecting his own feeling on them. MingXia didn’t feel quite right.

MingXia finished his plate of natto and got up to go to the lav when his legs promptly gave out.

Ivan was there to catch MingXia before he did a face plant.

“Do you think we gave him too much,” Ivan asked Simon anxiously.

“I don’t feel well,“ MingXia mumbled. He struggled to get back on his own two feet.

Ivan maintained a firm grip on the boy. This was for the best since MingXia’s limbs didn’t seem to be cooperating.

“You’re alright dear, I think you just need a bit of a rest,” Lady Alys stated comfortingly.

Ivan managed to get him over to a couch before the boy passed out.

“I feel a little guilty about this,” Ivan murmured.

 

It was two hours later that the remains of the Barrayaran ambassador’s car was found. The car had crashed through one of the flimsier railings and careened into a ravine. The fuel tank had hit at just the right angle that the car and its passengers had gone up in flames. Five bodies were present, three adult men, one woman, and a boy. Lord Vortrene had been fortunate in that he had not gone to return MingXia to his home. He was still alive and bustling away at the embassy when reports came in on what had happened.

 

Meanwhile a man and a woman, foreigners from Escobar were returning to their ship from a month long vacation. They had a number of souvenirs which took a great deal of time to get through customs and which frayed the nerves of multiple transit agents. The agents were happy to see the Escobaran tourists get on their flight. They did not pay half as much attention to the third man and his luggage.

 

It was not until they were on their Barrayaran ship and heading back to Barrayar that Ivan breathed a sigh of relief. Not merely because his artificial skin was sloughing off just as had been promised, but because it seemed like they had actually pulled their escape off. He supposed he shouldn’t have doubted Illyan and his mother’s ability to procure fake passports and some very convincing disguises. He glanced over at MingXia who was still out cold. 

Ivan figured it was better for the boy’s sanity that the kid hadn’t been awake when they stuffed him in a thermos-modifying bag that wouldn’t show heat signals when they walked him through customs. It also meant he wouldn’t try to argue with them. Simon in particular had worried the boy would refuse to come with them or wouldn’t be able to handle sneaking off the planet. Simon also knew that Lady Alys would not leave without her grandchild.

Ivan settled in to wait for the kid to wake up. He figured there might be cursing, swearing, or even crying when the boy realized they were in space. 

“I’m going to handle this,” Ivan said aloud as he stared at his reflection. He meant it as a promise to the kid, but also a promise to himself.

**Author's Note:**

> Considering how much Ivan is hinted at getting around I"m a little surprised that he doesn't have a few illegitimate kids. Ok, fine there's contraceptive technology but that must be new to Barrayar and Ivan was young and stupid once...
> 
> The KiNoUmi is based on the real life Aokighara in Japan


End file.
